The Sobbing & the Wailing

Last Saturday, the Merry Young Widows gathered together with friends and family to grieve for their dearly departed spouses. Oh, the sorrow of it all! In my own despair, I forgot to use my photogenic device. Take my word for it, it was a very interesting event. Her Grace Lavandar Beaumont went first with her eulogy. Her friends stood by her side. It was very moving - all those veils blowing in the breeze. Miss Robbiani followed with her anthem to her dearly departed Count who by some miracle left her as a virgin bride on their wedding night. In the meantime, there was all kinds of talk about wills, money, and estates left to the sorrowing widows. Somehow the conversations veered into the attributes and skills of stableboys. Mr. Sapwood stood firm in trying to maintain control of the services but at times I think he threw up his hands - and not just in prayer! I shared how I had met my lovely Sir Arthur Anderton in India. While working as a lowly governess - a very young governess by the way - who had been sent to India by her clergyman father with the hopes of obtaining a marriage by which to better my place in life. The white haired by manly Sir Arthur took me away from my governess drudgery to Aberconway Manor in Caledon. Morning rides with the groomsmen (Sir Arthur did not ride due to a war injury) and tea in the garden with neighbors is a long way from the heat of India. However, all was not peaches 'n cream in Aberconway Manor. Sir Arthur liked to wander - he liked to explore. He sailed off to Africa one last time. Upon his return to London, he celebrated in his club. Sad to say, it was his last celebration due to the quantity of port he imbibed. I was told by Lord Andress that the end was swift with Sir Arthur gasping, turning bright red, and sliding to the floor with his glass of port.



During my discourse, there was some discussion regarding the corpse lying in state in the coffin. Was he breathing or not? Mr. Hassanov was ready with a club in case a zombie appeared while Mr. Tairov also prepared himself to leap into battle if needed. The widows appreciated the gentlemen's leap to our defense with much hugging and smiling over one's shoulders at the aforementioned as well as other gentlemen who came to entertain - I mean console the widows.



Miss Wozniak and Miss Lyle began their brief remarks which almost ended in a rolling around on the floor fight under the casket. The ladies realized that their dearly departeds were the one and the same traveling man. Peace was restored as they began to compliment each other about their lovely widow's clothes. Mr. Sapwood ended the service with appropriate music. Miss Lyle was heard to say - or was it Miss Wozniak - "This veil is hot and has to go!"



The memorial service ended with dancing and conversation. Many Caledon friends joined us in the garden for dancing and munching from the funeral buffet. I was pleasantly surprised to meet a gentlemen who had journeyed to Caledon that evening to visit a friend. Lord Andras Basevi is all that is considered proper in his conversation and manner. He did not join our party as he had just arrived from a desert location and did not want to interrupt the services. For some reason, I think I should know this gentleman but my memory escapes why or where that acquaintance would have taken place. Something to consider when I return home to Aberconway Manor.